Welcome to my Weblog!
Welcome to 1 Mother 2 Another! To read my most recent weblog entries, scroll down. To read entries from one category, click the links at right. To read my journey from the beginning, click here. To find out more about me, click here.
Top 5s
Short on time? Click here to go to my Top 5s Page - links to my top five recommendations in every category from Breastfeeding Sites to Urban Living Solutions.

Baby Steps Away

Yesterday, Madeleine took two steps away from me.

 Not physical steps; she didn’t magically stand up and walk on her 4 1/2-month-old legs.  But she began her journey to independence from me in two very real ways:
  1. Madeleine ate her first grown-up food.  True, it was only a tablespoon of rice cereal mixed with a lot of breast milk, but it was the first time she put anything in her body that I didn’t make.
  2. Brian and I both left the house.  Together.  Without her.  For four hours, she was in my mother’s care, and not within earshot of at least one of her parents, again for the first time.  And what was worse, when I called to check in, I could hear her cooing and giggling in the background!  No crying, no anguish, no loneliness.  Which is good, right?


As parents, we want our children to grow up to be happy, well-adjusted adults.  One of my biggest fears in becoming a mother was that I would not properly equip my son or daughter to be independent and confident.  I would make them either too dependent on me to the point that they doubted themselves and always stayed in my wingspan, or I’d throw them out of the nest too quickly in an effort to teach them to fly before they were ready and they’d hurt themselves.  We constantly walk a tightrope between wanting our kids to know we’ll always be there for them and making them so strong it never occurs to them to call on us.  I know that.  And I know that these two occurrences – her first “meal” and her time without us – are teeny, tiny baby steps: it’s not as if she’s starting to date or visiting prospective colleges.  She still needs us for more than a roof over her head and an allowance.  But she has clearly begun the indefatigable, inexorable process of taking the fences we’ve built tight around her tiny body, tearing them down, and building them back up again a teensy weensy bit further out from her.  It’s the nexus of her life as a separate entity from me.  And while I’m grateful she is content with my mom, and happy I won’t be breast-feeding for the next ten years, I found myself lying in bed last night and the only way I could describe my feeling was – sad.

0 comments:

Post a Comment

House Rules

Here are the rules for posting comments on 1mother2another.com. Posting a comment that violates these rules will result in the comment’s deletion, and you’ll probably be banned from commenting in the future.

1) Register first. If you would like to post a comment, you must create an account with us. Check out the home page to do so.

2) Constructive comments only. If you cannot maintain a respectful tone in your posting, even in disagreement, your comment will be deleted. We’re all trying to find our way in this thing and are struggling to be the best moms we can. If you disagree with something I say, feel free to politely email me. If you disagree with another reader’s posting, you’re welcome to kindly post in reply. Vitriolic diatribes will be deleted. This site is about encouraging and supporting, not tearing down and chastising.

3) Questions welcomed. If an entry raises a question, you’re welcome to email me directly or post it. Keep in mind that postings will result in public replies by strangers and not just me.

4) Don’t steal. All original writings contained within this website are under copyright protection. If you link to us, please credit us as your source and provide a link back to our website. If you're interested in using an excerpt in published material, please contact us.

5) Share your photos! We'd love to have photos from our registered readers to show on our home page under "Maddie's friends". Email us a jpeg of your little one's best photo to photos@1mother2another.com. Please, no photos from professional photographers which fall under copyright protection.