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Bring On The Stinky Onions

The croup is making its rounds here, and between that and walking pneumonia I’ve given the following homeopathic help out so much that onion farmers are lining up to be my very own political action committee. So I thought I’d post it up here and share the love.

For the record, I didn’t make this up. I first read about this over a year ago on Keeper of the Home, and before that we probably had a few hundred thousand people do it back when people didn’t have instant access to a CVS and looked in their back yards for some relief.

And finally for the other record, I’m not a doctor, so don’t listen to me. You know what I mean. If you or your kid has a medical issue, seek professional help and for heaven’s sake don’t say “But this chick I read on the internet said to . . . .”

With the caveats out of the way, here goes.

You’ve got walking pneumonia and your lungs sound all spongy and full. Or your child has croup and is barking all night long. Or you’ve had some virus that is causing you to cough and stay up into the wee hours and you’re dying for some relief. What’s a girl to do?

Head to the kitchen.

Listen, this is the easiest homeopathic remedy in my laminated book (yes, there is a book. Yes, it’s laminated. Surely there’s a homeopathic remedy for the obsessive need to organize and laminate). Get an onion, cut it up into slices, and sleep with the bowl next to your bed. You’ll breathe easier overnight, and in the morning your lungs will feel better.

How does this work? I know that when you cut an onion, a chemical is released that makes you cry, right? Well, that same chemical has mucho healing properties. So breathe deep, my friend.

I promise, this works. My kids now beg for an onion in their rooms if they’re ailing. I just shove mine through my food processor and the whole thing takes five seconds. Sure, the bedroom smells like a burger joint in the morning, but your kid’s breathing easier, and that’s worth a little fast-food stink, right?

This doesn’t work for some kinds of coughs, I’ve found. If I’ve had bad allergies and lots of drainage down my throat that gives me a sore throat, which then starts tickling as it heals and causes me to cough, the onion doesn’t work as well. But if it’s anything in my lungs, or any germ that’s caused the cough itself, I swear I can breathe easier with the onion next to me. A friend of mine tried this and her visiting dad ate the onions the next morning for breakfast – waste not, want not.

You don’t have to do that.

So keep a big onion on hand for the next time Junior starts barking or whooping or even some kind of boring cough.

I promise you’ll be glad you did.


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